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There Was A Safety Meeting At Work Today. They Asked
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The Speed At Which A Woman Says “I’m Fine.
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Happy Birthday You Old Fart
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Behind Every Nagging Woman There’s A Man Trying To Do Fuck All!
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I’m Not Wearing Any Underwear Because You Never Put The Fucking Laundry
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Every Woman’s Dream Is That A Man Will Take Her In His Arms Throw Her Into Bed...
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When I Think About You I Touch Myself I Rub My Temples Because You Give Me
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Fuckety Fuck It's Your Birthday
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Happy Birthday Ginger Pubes
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Have You Ever Looked At One Of Your Relatives Shook Your Head And Thought
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You’re Riding A Horse Full Speed Theres’s A Giraffe Next To You And A Lion Chasing You!
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Your Penis Is Cordially Invited To The Party In My Vagina
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Once Upon A Time There Was A Twat. It Was You. The End.
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When You’re Over 40 It’s No Longer Called Masturbation It’s Called A System Check
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It’s Never Too Late To Be What You Want To Be ...Unless You Want To Be Younger
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Awesome Things Will Happen On Your Birthday If You Choose Not To Be A Miserable Cow
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Alcohol Is Not In My Vodkabulary
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I Bought You A Pair Of Slippers And A Dildo For Your Birthday
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You’re A Knobhead But You’re My Knobhead
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You Are Pretty Fucking Awesome
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