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Husband (noun) A person who never shares a secret he is told, because he isn’t even listening. Takes the bins out.
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Im-ma-ture (noun) A word used by boring people to describe fun people.
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Life (noun) Get up at 5am, battle the traffic. Work your ass off all day. Fight the traffic again. Drink, Sleep. See also: The End
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Men-o-pause (noun) The time of life when a woman doesn’t know if she is on fire or freezing, happy or sad. May self medicate with: Wine, chocolate and new shoes. Derived from the latin word for WTF is happening to me.
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Mom (noun) Someone who sees the best in her kids even when they drive her crazy. Unconditional love. See also: Superwoman
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Mombie (noun) A sleep deprived mom, characterised by a messy bun and pyjamas bottoms. Also: Feeds on caffeine.
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Momster (noun) What happens to mom after she counts to three. See also: mad woman
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Mother, (Noun) A person with the ability to detect a lie, hear through walls and see’s out the back of her head.
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Mum (noun) Someone who has a great sense of humour, is perfect in every way and enjoys alcohol.
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Nanatude (Verb) What happens to Nan’s when someone crosses there grand children.
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Noginophobhia (No-gin-o-phobia - verb) The fear one feels when you are out of juniper based spirit.
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Procrastidrinking (Noun) The art of drinking alcohol instead of doing something else you should be doing.
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Propaganda (verb) What Cockney’s do when they are really looking at something.
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Relationship (noun) The ability to put up with someone else’s bullshit, usually of the opposite sex, for a long period of time.
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Shitastrophy (Verb) A word used for massive mess ups, fucked up situations and epic fails
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Snac-cident (noun) Calling a family size bar of chocolate entirely by mistake.
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Soul-mate (noun) Someone who does the same weird things you do.
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Succeed (verb) Achieve the desired aim or result: If at first you don’t succeed... try doing it the way your wife told you.
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Teenager (noun) People who get no respect and are looked down upon because a lot of them are idiots.
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Unfuckwithable (Adjective) Someone who is truly at peace and in touch with themselves. Nothing anyone says or does bothers them. No negativity or drama can touch them.
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